Me: What was I going to say?
Brother 1: You were going to say that I'm the most amazing grilled cheese sandwich maker in the world.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Friday, September 29, 2006
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Watching CSI: Miami with Brother 2
Brother 2: How are they taping this show now? Wasn't Miami destroyed by that hurricane? Oh, wait, was that Orlando? Orlando Bloom?
Me: New Orleans?
Brother 2: Yeah, that's it.
There are problems with our school system when Brother 2 gets Orlando Bloom and New Orleans confused. Or maybe he's just a moron.
Posted by Vanessa at 5:25 PM
Monday, September 25, 2006
Ok, so picture this: You're driving down the street, and the silver Honda Civic in front of you is rocking back in forth, while moving. Like, majorly rocking back and forth.
Driving Brother 2, Brother 2's girlfriend, Cousin J, and some other kid to Walgreens.
Brother 2's gf: LUGGAGE!!!!!!!
and then, they start rocking back and forth, so hard that my car is shaking... it doesn't stop until Brother 2 hits his head on the window.
Posted by Vanessa at 12:53 PM
Sunday, September 24, 2006
Mom: We're having stuffed chicken tonight for dinner, but I know you don't like stuffing, so I got you one stuffed with asparagus. But then, as I was leaving the butcher, I remembered that you don't like chicken, or asparagus. Sorry.
Me: Dad likes asparagus, you could give it to him.
Mom: I also got you blue tortilla chips... you like those right?
Me: Brother 2 likes those.
Posted by Vanessa at 7:04 PM
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Friday, September 22, 2006
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Brother 2: Here's the $20 for the iPod case I got.
Me: I think you owe me more than $20, you also got body wash.
Brother 2: See, I was thinking that you would buy the soap as a "I'm Glad My Brother Doesn't Smell Like Ass" present.
Me: Oh, really?
Brother 2: Yeah... I mean, you wouldn't want to be responsible for me smelling like ass.
Posted by Vanessa at 2:39 PM
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Monday, September 18, 2006
Wouldn't it be funny if all inanimate objects talked like the characters in Pokemon?
Leather Couch: LEATHER LEATHER LEAAAAAAATHER Couuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuch, Leather Couch, Leather Couch, LEATHER COOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUCH.
And then, the dry wall would get annoyed.
Dry Wall: DRY Wall. DRY Wall. DRYYYYYYYYYYYY WALL.
And then, all the remote controls would go crazy.
Remote Controls: remote, remote, remote, remoteremoteremote.
And clothing would talk too!!!
A guy would walk by, and you'd hear: WHITEY TIGHTIES!! white white white white white.
And a girl would walk by, and you'd hear:...................................
So you'd know you should go talk to her.
Posted by Vanessa at 11:21 AM
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Sunday, September 10, 2006
My Dad has cataracts in his right eye, and a detached retina in his left.
He was looking at something really close up at work:
Dad: I can see it ok if I look through my eagle eye.
Me: Which one's that?
Dad: The right one, the left one is my parrot eye. It doesn't work as well.
Posted by Vanessa at 1:04 AM
Saturday, September 09, 2006
Friday, September 08, 2006
So we went to Buffalo Park, a state park in Illinois, that has these really cool land sculptures. Here's a picture of the water bug:
We had walked up the head of the frog when Brother 2 had something to say.
Brother 2: Do you think, if I sit here long enough, I'll become one with nature, and the grasshoppers will sit in my hair?
Posted by Vanessa at 8:17 AM
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Phone rings at work.
Me: Gear & Repair.
Brother 1: Hi. Is Dad there?
Me: He's working on something, want me to go get him?
Brother 1: No, that's ok, just tell him that I called to say I had a meat-loaf sandwich for lunch today, on toasted bread, with mayonnaise.
Posted by Vanessa at 2:33 PM
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Monday, September 04, 2006
The male members of the family are very upset today. If you haven't already heard, Steve Irwin, aka Crocodile Hunter, was killed by a stingray.
Brother 1 is in mourning, and Brother 2 is trying to figure out a way to get him back.
Brother 2: I have a plan... what if we sacrifice all the stingrays in the world to God in exchange for Steve Irwin being brought back to life?
Posted by Vanessa at 12:57 PM