I'm Not Sure I Like Pears Anymore...

Downstairs reading when this conversation catches my attention.

Brother 1: And we'll lock Cousin J in the closet with a dead fish, a pear, and a paddle. And when we close the door, the light will go out, the pear will beat Cousin J with the paddle. Then, when the light turns back on, the pear will be laying there on the floor with the paddle and the dead fish. No one will see it move.

Me: What are you guys talking about?

Brother 1: We're thinking of ways to torture Cousin J... that was our best plan.




5 minutes later...

Brother 1: Sometime, you bite into a pear and it's really hard and it tastes like asshole.

Cousin J: Exactly.

Brother 1: And sometimes, you bite into a pear and it's really soft and it tastes like...

Cousin J: A baby.

Brother 1: Yeah, I guess.