Match.com

Me: I need to call Cousin H.

Mom: To ask her about Match.com?

Me: No... to tell her what day I can come visit. Match.com is different for people my age... when you're 30, you have hot divorcées to look through, when you're 22, you have crazy people who are desperate.

Brother 1: Mom told me I have to join Match.com, because without a girlfriend I'm less of a man. Her exact words.