Fluids

Me: I hope my water breaks tonight.

Brother 2: I DO NOT need to hear about your vaginal fluids!

Cankles

Kyle: Be careful walking here, the ground is pretty uneven. You don't want to roll a cankle.

I Have a Person Inside Me

We call Brother 1 a rhino, because he is a rhino.

Brother 1: I'm at 199 pounds! Sweet!

Me: Shit. You can't loose more than five pounds before the baby is born.

Brother 1: Will I weigh less than you?!?! I'm going on the Lemonade Diet! I'm going to lose 10 pounds in a week, and start calling you Rhino!

Beatles

Dad: You should have gotten up earlier today. Vanessa and I got to watch 80's music videos on VH1.

Me: And British 1 hit wonders!

Dad: But then, a Paul McCartney concert came on. It gave me really horrible diarrhea.

Thanks...

Mom: What were you wearing on Saturday?

Me: A dress... why?

Mom: Well, Brother 1 said that he was a little embarrassed when you guys were out to dinner at that fancy restaurant, 'cause he was in a t-shirt. I asked him what you were wearing, and he said, "One of those pregnant muumuu things."

Nursery

Me: Ok, we've got the crib and mattress, some sheets for the bassinet. Can you think of anything else our nursery needs that we didn't register for?

Kyle: More monkeys. There are definitely not enough monkeys in the nursery.



And that's how we ended up doing one entire wall in monkey decals :)